Category: The Good Man

What’s in a name?

The Good Man, being the very good man that he is, agreed to run my car into the shop today. So as such, he drove me to work this morning.

As we careened down the Bay Area highways, we were cut off by a Mercury Mountaineer.

I said to TGM, “The Mountaineer…that was never really a big hit, was it?”

TGM said, “No, it’s essentially a Ford Explorer anyway.”

Then I replied, “I always thought Mountaineer was a stupid car name anyway.”

Which tipped off a whole conversation about absurd car names…TGM was on a ROLL. I laughed my head off and in the middle of his rant, I said, “I foresee a blog entry.”

So here it is. The content below is mostly stolen from the brilliant mind of TGM.

Without further ado, my top five most absurd names of cars you’ll see rolling on the roads today:

5. Nissan Armada. “What, is the main feature that it sinks off the coast of England?” said TGM (A comment that had me laughing so hard I got a stitch in my side.)

4. Dodge Durango. What a wimpy SUV name. Have these people ever actually BEEN to Durango. I have. And what is it about the sleepy Colorado town that the car should evoke? Am I supposed to think snow? And mountains? No, I think tourist trap. Look at me in my rolling tourist trap.

3. Chevy Avalanche. “Now that name is appropriate, it is a disaster rolling down a hill.” (TGM was on fire this morning.)

2. Toyota Echo. “It’s bears a faint resemblance to a car, but isn’t actually a car.”

1. The winner and still the King: Ford Probe. “I sure as hell don’t want something made by Ford up in space,” said TGM. To which I replied “or up my butt”.

Yes, childish as I am…the Ford Probe makes me think of something more…medical. I don’t want to think of uncomfortable medical situations while driving to work every morning.

Or maybe that’s just me.

Anyhow…there were plenty more, but I was laughing so hard, I couldn’t make notes.

Special thanks to TGM for both his brilliance and for making the ride to work more fun.

If you drive any of the above automobiles, I’m sure it’s a *fine* car…just has a dorkish name! :)

Go Speed Racer!

Whoo! Had quite the day at “work”. I put the air quotes around it, because even though I got up at the usual time and drove in to work, I didn’t do any *actual* work today.

It was the occasion of my group’s annual holiday offsite event. This is only my fourth week of employment.

We went to a new and very well managed Go Kart Racing facility. They are set up for corporate “team building” events. I dunno if talking smack and bumping your coworker ’round the curves is building a team, but it was a heck of a lot of fun.

We were broken up into two teams and each team got two goes at the race course. First was “warm up” laps, to learn the course. Then it got serious. I placed in the middle of the pack for times in the warm up laps.

Then we did a “qualifying round,” and from the results would be positioned for the final round.

So, while we waited for the qualifying round, oh did the smack talk begin. The “you’re going down!” comments started flying. And not from me. No, they came AT me. And I smiled. And I put on my pink helmet.

And I kicked everyone’s ass.

That’s right, I won the qualifying round, got the pole position, and never looked back.

Many of my new coworkers were like “wow, you were really…aggressive…out there.” Umm hmm…they wouldn’t have said that to a male driver. I’m just sayin’.

I was proud because another of my coworkers, one who took the MOST grief (they told her she drove like she was taking her kids to school. That ain’t right) came in second right behind me.

Girl Power!

After the racing then we played pool, ate and talked about the team and how we’ll approach next year.

So far, I’m really digging this job. Some of the best folks I’ve ever worked with. I just hope I can step up soon and be a fully functioning member of the group. They’ve been nothing but great to me.

Next up: the entire corporation has a holiday event Saturday. The Good Man gets to go too. It’s gonna be BIG fun!

Oh Geez

The Feline has been named “Pet of the Month” by our vet.

Oh the fame. The demands. The rider clause to be added on to her appearance contract.

“One (1) big clear glass bowl of kibble. All the irregular shapes ones picked out. One (1) bottle Evian. Room temperature.”

She’ll go from merely a pain in the patooty to insufferable.

Diva Feline.

I’ll do a tell all with the tabloids about her addiction to batting at the venetian blinds and that time I found her in a “compromising position” in the laundry basket.

I’ll have to teach her how to get out of a limo correctly, tail down, so we don’t have a little “Britney incident” on our hands.

Upshot is maybe all the media pressure will encourage her to drop those extra lingering four pounds she fights.

Do I need to find a celebrity trainer to take her on?

Ugh.

Hope we get a reality show out of this.

The Spirit of Christmas I Don’t Wanna

That’s me. See me rattle my chains.

I am such the scrooge this year, I just don’t have “that special spirit” inside of me.

I *want* to have the spirit. I just don’t. Not a bit.

You ever notice that? Some years, the whole joy of the season takes hold and it becomes a good idea to festoon every surface available with blinky lights and tinsel, guzzle eggnog and play Burl Ives on your CD player.

And some years, it’s like pain to even unfold the fake tree and plug it into the wall.

That’s me the year, the second one.

Not even rousing Xmas carols in the lobby of my building at work can draw me out of the holiday doldrums.

You know it’s bad when I mentioned to The Good Man about Biscochitos and how maybe I should again this year. But that I just *can’t* get up the energy to make ’em (despite looking forward to nipping a sip of the brandy the recipe requires).

You *know* if I can’t get it together to make cookies, then SOMETHING must be wrong with me!

I did have an hour or so of the holiday “thang” over the weekend when TGM and I went to Toys R Us to fulfill the wishes of the kids on The Family Giving Tree tags I pulled this year.

As TGM and I discussed the relative merits of one Lego Bionicle set over another, I can say that, yes, I was feelin’ it.

But then trying to get our purchases to the car and get out of the ding dang parking lot…it evaporated again.

Oh well, I can’t change the inevitable. The Hellidays will be here soon, whether I’m ready for them or not.

*sigh*

It’s the small victories that add up

I am ridiculously excited because, on the advice of a couple coworkers, I’ve found a different route to take to work. It’s actually a few miles longer in distance, but since traffic rolls and no stop-go, stop-go, it actually shaves 10 to 15 minutes off my commute.

TEN TO FIFTEEN MINUTES! That means that over the course of a week, I could get around two extra hours with my sweetie. Or sleeping. Or fast asleep next to my sweetie. All good options!

I’ve got the drive down to about 25 minutes each way, now. Commute to the old job was 45 to 50 minutes each way.

THIS is a victory for sanity!