Category: work

East bound and down…

…loaded up and truckin’

Yes, I just quoted the theme from “Smokey and the Bandit” and I’m not sorry.

Ok, maybe a little sorry. But I’d do it again.

I’m in kind-of-panicked but mostly excited mode because I have some travel coming up next week.

In the many long years I’ve worked at The Company, I’ve only traveled a scant three times. This will be my fourth trip on the company dime.

I get to go to Northern Florida. For a conference.

There’s not a lot going on in the Northern half of Florida. But that’s ok. I got that “anywhere but here” thing going. I haven’t traveled in a REALLY long time and I’m anxious to get going. I do love to go places.

There are some downsides.

1) It’s Florida. And still Spring Break season. I may have to pimp slap some drunk college kids. I’ll do it too.

2) I’m not going for fun. I’m going to work. True, a conference isn’t exactly *work*, but it involves sitting indoors, eating conference chicken and being over air conditioned to within an inch of my life.

3) It is one long ass plane ride to get from the left coast to the right one. Yeah, shaddup all you “oh, but to fly to Australia is WAY longer” or whatever. I’m just saying… Mama gets restless on a plane. Five hours plus three time zones is just long enough to piss me off, not long enough to get anywhere really good…like London or something.

4) Disney. God I hate Disney. And there is little else to do BUT freakin’ Disney where I’m going. Gaaaaah! I Googled “fun non-Disney things to do” and found…well, not much.

Oh well. It’s a trip. That I’m not paying for. It will be warm. I won’t have to sit at my desk. And the Atlantic is warm.

So there you have it.

I keep thinking “oh, I should pack goggles” then remind myself “WORK! This is work!”

I am taking the camera tho…I’ll share any interesting shots. (nod to Avelino on this)

Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy…

No, I’m not doing an Easter bunny impression. Tho Easter is nigh…can you JUST believe it? Easter already. To where do the months evaporate?

Meanwhile, back to my anticipatory restlessness.

I have truly become an internet consumer. I ordered something *really cool* online last week. They said it would ship the next day. It did not. My expectation was one day ship. I demand one day ship!

Yesterday I navigated an awful call tree at Big Conglomerate (and I work for a different Big Conglomerate and procure call trees as part of my job, so I know from which I speak) and when I finally got a real person on the line, I screwed up my righteous indignation and demanded to know where my not inexpensive product was.

I was told, “huh…we can’t figure out why it didn’t ship. I need to contact the warehouse. It will take 24 to 48 business hours to get back to you.”

Business hours? Ok, where I come from “business day” is eight hours. I’m no good at math, but 24 divided by 8 is THREE DAYS.

To which I replied, “I am NOT happy with that estimate”.

They said that was just to protect in case of a weekend, but they really meant one to two days.

One day has elapsed. No response.

Back on the phone. In an endless hold queue.

How ’bout this to ponder. Why does on hold music universally SUCK? It is the soundtrack to my insanity. It really is.

Meanwhile, my leg is bouncing.

I reeeeeally want this item I’ve ordered. It’s not like air or food or something. I just have internet buyer lust.

Plus, by buying something, I’m, like, helping the economy, maaahn!

*sigh*

“Please continue to hold and your call will be answered in the order it was received.”

: hostile :

Minutiae, day two

Yeah, I’m really on this microscopic thang. Bear with me, it will pass.

Today’s subject of my intense scrutiny is the ticket validator machines for CalTrain.

Here’s the situation. To catch a commute on the train you gotta have a ticket to get ‘er done. Some people do single rides. You buy that day of from a machine at the station. Some people do a monthly pass. You get that in advance (or from the machines). You just flash that to the conductor and it keeps you on the train.

But for many of us, we buy a ten-ride ticket (more cost effective if you ride occasionally, not every day). So in order to get a ride, you have to punch your ticket. So to do that, you slip the ticket into the validator machine and it punches your ticket, stamps date and expiration time (four hours), and cuts off the ride number on the side.

Here, better to go visual on this. Please excuse the crappy iPhone photos.

Here’s what a ten-ride pass looks like:

Note the slots for the rides and you can see the numbers off to the side. You can see that this morning I punched off the number 5.

Here is the validator machine:

And obviously, here’s how it works:

So here’s my question. One of those “you’ve got way too much thinking time on your hands” type of deals.

What happens to all of those punched numbers? I mean, look at the machine, it’s not that big?

A LOT of people punch their tickets every day. And as evidenced by the fact that they are always out of ink, the CalTrain people don’t service the machines very often. So the punched numbers build up in there…I’m guessing.

Where do they go? I assume they stay up there in the red part, but that doesn’t seem like a lot of room.

And when they service the machine, what do they do with the little numbered punchouts? Like confetti in there?

I posed this last night to The Good Man and he patiently suggested that they save them up for the CalTrain New Year’s Eve parties.

But I really am curious. I mean, I suppose they just toss them out, but given that there are, like, 24 stations punching both northbound and southbound riders, that’s a LOT of little punched numbers. It seems like something useful could be done with all of those?

Or am I over thinking it? Don’t answer that…

Because mainly, all this ticket validator scrutiny was just me trying to distract my “no wanna go to work” mind. Succeeded, too, for a little while.

So while you too ponder little numbered confettis, here’s my “art shot”…a glance northbound up the tracks, to help get you in the pondering mood.

The healing powers of lunch

I just got back from having lunch with a good friend. A real lunch. Off site. At a restaurant where you sit down at a table, are served by a gracious waiter and use a cloth napkin.

No hurried dash to the company cafeteria for food placed into recyclable plastic containers and dining over my keyboard. I actually got UP from my chair, went out of doors and had a meal cooked just for ME.

And I have to say, my outlook on life has improved a lot today.

Like. A lot.

I feel less tense. More satiated. I’m less growly and grumpy.

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, but lunch ranks right up there. Lunch sets the tone for my whole afternoon. Yesterday, squinched at my desk slurping tomato soup and picking at a salad, I was cranky, uncreative, surly.

Today, I’m cracking jokes, feeling reasonable and creative. I’m happy. My team is happy. Hell, I even cancelled staff meeting, much to their joy.

Better living through Honey Walnut Prawns.

Windex, please

Today is a nice day. I mean a *really* nice day. Yesterday was a NICE day. Sunny. Clear. Warm.

What am I?

A *grownup*

What does that mean?

I have to *work*

I can’t run around outside being silly and leaping after butterflies.

No, I have to be all *responsible*

Ugh.

It’s not fair.

I’m in my office with my nose pressed against the window. The sun is *out there*! I can see it! I need to have that! Why do I have to sit here and read contracts while there is FUN outside!

*sigh*

rattin’ smattin’ employment……