Oh Go On Now

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You know what I’m going to say. So, so predictable. But I’m going there anyway.

After what seems like, oh I don’t know, eighty years, the Presidential election is tomorrow.

Finally.

This whole election season has been weird and ugly and I’m pretty much ready for it to be over.

I truly hope that by the end of tomorrow it really is over. No crazy. No ugly. Just a clean, clear winner.

In order for that to happen, everyone needs to vote. Even if your think your vote doesn’t matter, vote anyway.

Hell, it gives you credibility when you want to complain later.

Why not? It’s the hip thing to do and hey, the new voting machines are kind of fun! Whoo!

If you have already cast your vote then you are entitled to one chocolate chip cookie. Buy yourself a good one and enjoy it.

The calories don’t count when you are being a good American citizen.

And if you haven’t voted yet, then go and cast your vote and when you are through, you too are entitled to a calorie free ooey gooey cookie.

Got it? Vote = guilt free chocolate chip cookie.

All right now. You know what to do.****






****This blog post is for entertainment purposes only. Of course really nummy choccy chip cookies have calories but hey, let’s all pretend for a moment that they don’t and just reward ourselves for doing the right thing. Neither the Oh Fair New Mexico blog nor Karen Fayeth can be held liable for any damage to your waistline from the ingestion of really tasty chocolate chip cookies. Votes don’t equal cookies but maybe you can make it so. Just vote, ok? Whether or not you enjoy a cookie afterwards is up to you. Thanks for listening.


Image from Babble.




The M Stands Accused

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On or about the day of September 18 in the year of our Lord two thousand and twelve, the defendant was seen both loitering and malingering in the hallway at my place of employ.

Slouching fetchingly on the top of a lateral file cabinet. The tramp.

And on said date, on or about 3:42pm, the defendant stands accused of calling out in a beckoning, sultry, irresistible manner.

So alluring was this siren call that no reasonable man or woman, especially woman, could be expected to maintain even a modicum of self-control in the face of such raw, base power.

As a result of the defendant’s irresponsible actions, the victim was thusly lured to the defendant and did partake of the goodies offered thereto.

And it was good.

However, the defendant now stands accused of gross misconduct, excessive deliciousness, and being the addictive combination of sugar, fat and salt.

The victim hereby claims damages to her waistline, thighs and double chin. And a big pile of guilt on her shoulders for all to see.

And so, you criminal, you plague of society, you vile tempter, how to you plead in the face of such strong allegations?



Peanut Butter M&M’s, you sneaky bastards!


Playing silent eh? We’ll see about that.

You and your little friends, you are going to be put away someplace for a very long time.

A very, very long time.

Git in mah bellay!





Image from Terribly Awesome.