Filed under: adorable, anxiety, automobiles, awkward, Bay Area, birds, curious, drama, friends, funny, gratitude, laffs, life, manners, Opinions, peculiar, play through, polite, powerful woman, sunshine, Theme Thursday, truth is stranger than..., walking, work, yes boss
There’s a lady I work with who I like a lot, and she and I have become pretty good friends. We’ve decided, together, that we need to get more exercise during our long work days. To that end, we’ve started taking lunchtime walks along all the wonderful walking paths near our office.
During the walks, we generally kibitz or cuss about work or discuss the news of the day. I’ve learned that my new friend is a big fan of birds, I think she keeps three at home. She loves looking at all the wild birds out there in our marshland ponds, and I do too.
I’ve talked before about the proliferation of birds, and especially Canada geese, here in my vicinity.
Yesterday my friend and I were walking around the lake at a brisk pace when she suddenly stopped and gasped. “Look at that goose!” she said and pointed.
Running along one side our little lake is a very busy street. This goose was strutting out into traffic, headed for a sizable puddle of standing water. There must have been something tasty looking in that stale water, because the goose would not be denied, full speed ahead…until a car went zooming by, and the goose was blown back by the jet wash.
“Get back here!” my friend shouted to the unsteady goose, as though her maternal tone would make it mind its manners.
“Get back here you goose! You silly, silly goose! You’re a silly goose! Yes you are, why are you such a silly goose?”
Oddly, the goose must have known he was in the presence of One Who Knows Birds, because it did just as she asked. It looked at her warily, then that silly high stepping goose strutted its way back over to the curb, ungracefully waddled up, and went about its way munching at the green grass.
“That’s a good goose,” my friend said as we continued our walk.
I smiled to myself. Now, just who is the real silly goose? The one trying to find food for its existence, or the human hollering at a bird?
Since today is actually Thursday, then it must be time for Theme Thursday. Today’s prompt is: Silly
Filed under: anglophilia, anxiety, art, awkward, bloody Brits, Brooklyn, crazy, disappointed, drama, kerfuffle, laffs, life, love and marriage, make it work, monkey mind, New Mexico, Opinions, play through, pondering, psychosis, silly, sleep deprived, The Good Man, thursday, truth is stranger than..., weirdity, writer's block, writing
Today I rose from my bed and dashed down the hall (with yowling cat underfoot) to look at this week’s Theme Thursday webpage.
I was excited to get started on my blog post for the day. But as the page loaded, alas, no updates.
I fretted, I hit refresh, I worried. What will become of me if I don’t have a Theme Thursday prompt!
About an hour later, I decided “screw it, I’ll make my own theme.”
So I hit my favorite random word website.
The first word offered up was: reactionary
This made me think of chemical reactions things that go *BOOM*
But then I actually Googled the word and it was a lot of blah-blah-blah political stuff and people being mad.
Well that’s no fun.
So after checking the Theme Thursday site again, I went back to the random word site.
This time I got: wipe
Which made me go “ewwwwwww.” Yeah, I know, wipe can be used in non-ew ways. So I considered it. 600 words about wipe? Yeah, no.
Back to the word well.
Third try: Zoom
Ok, that’s a spicier word, and a blog post would allow me to drop the word onomatopoeia in conversation. That part rocks.
But for some reason, onomatopoeia or not, the word zoom wasn’t really inspiring me.
So I checked the Theme Thursday site again, cursed, and went back to the random word site.
Fourth time’s a charm? No, not really. I got: row
As in, the boat? Or have a? (in the British use) Or sit in the?
Pull the magic lever again!
This time I got: advertising
What? No. I got nothing for that….
Feeling a bit frustrated and unable to find a suitable theme for today, this sunny Thursday, I sighed.
Then my brain went screeeeeeetch as though someone had applied non-ABS brakes too firmly. My mind skidded out to the side and off into a bar ditch**.
And that little voice inside my head said, “Hey, ding-a-ling, it’s Wednesday.”
So we’ll see you again tomorrow with the officially sanctioned Theme Thursday post.
Until then, forty lashes with a page a day calendar!
This awesome Fail Whale rendition is by Ed Wheeler and found on deviantart.com. Follow him on Twitter @EduardoWheeler
**I dropped the phrase “bar ditch” on The Good Man yesterday when he called to report he’d experienced a flat tire while in the heart of San Francisco. I said “are you ok?” he said “Sure, why wouldn’t I be?” I replied, “well, you’re not off in a bar ditch somewhere, right?”
And then my dearest paused. This is one of those times where a Brooklyn boy and a New Mexico girl are not linguistically on the same page.
I filled the awkward space by saying, “Yeah, not that San Francisco has bar ditches.”
He replied, “Uh, yeah….so anyhow…I called AAA and they should be here in about ten minutes.”
Filed under: anglophilia, awkward, blogging, bloody Brits, business is business, cranky, deadlines, disappointed, disapproving boss, life, make it work, meeting hell, Opinions, overwhelmed, play through, time, work, yes boss
Remember back in the day when computers were brought to the desktop of every office worker? These funky machines came with the promise of less manual tasks and thus, more time!
More time! What an awesome benefit.
You know how when you get a good raise, you first think to yourself, “This is great! My expenses will stay the same and I’ll bank the difference of this new paycheck.”
But then you don’t. You manage to find a way to expand to use up every single dollar of that new pay.
Yeah. It’s like that with all the “found time” that computers brought to my world.
Right now time is the scarcest and most valuable resource I have.
There are only 24 hours in a day to spend.
I use eight of them sleeping.
Another three or so on getting ready, eating, travel time between destinations, dealing with a yowling cat, hugging The Good Man, etc.
And twelve sitting in front of a computer screen working my buns off on a massive project at work.
Let’s see…twelve plus eight is twenty…plus three is twenty three….
That leaves, uh, yeah, one hour in the day where I can just skive off (as the British say) and have some fun.
One hour to write, and craft, and think, and read a book, and just sit for a moment and look at the sky and daydream.
One hour. Sixty small minutes.
That’s not very much. I’d best use it wisely.
What got me thinking about this today?
The ten minutes I sat, waiting, on an open conference call bridge waiting for my perpetually absentminded sales rep.
I only gave it ten, then I got back to work.
I’m a little bit aggrieved about that ten minutes. Especially since I wolfed down lunch in order to make that call in time.
And now I’m indigested.
This should get better by end of April. That’s a looooong thirty days.
And for all you smarty pants out there, yes, I found time to write this blog post. I used the hour I WOULD have spent on that conference call. Found time! Yesssss! Photo by Chris Gilbert and used royalty free from stock.xchng.
Photo by Chris Gilbert and used royalty free from stock.xchng.
Filed under: anxiety, automobiles, awkward, Bay Area, big weather, business is business, California, choices, criminals, cursing, drama, driving, game face, gratitude, guilt, humility, Jeep, karma, kerfuffle, learning, life, make it work, manners, melancholy, Opinions, ouch, photography, play through, polite, rain, rules, safety, show and tell, sigh, woo hoo!, worried
Yesterday I drove to the small downtown section of a small town to meet with a group of photographers. It was our scheduled monthly get together.
I pulled into a parking spot and as I put ‘er in park, I noticed a police car parked right behind me.
As I opened my door to exit the vehicle, I noticed a uniformed police officer approaching me.
Me: “Hello, officer.”
PO: (stoic) “Hello.”
Me: “What can I do for you?”
PO: “You can’t make that left turn you just made.”
ME: *puzzled look* Then I consider being a cutup and saying, “Oh, but I can! I just did! Wanna see me do it again?” But I rein in my inner smart alec.
PO: (looking at my puzzled look) “You made a turn across the lane to get into this parking spot. You can’t do that.”
Me: “Really? Oh shit.” (<- yes, I actually said oh shit to a cop. Not the brightest bulb that Albuquerque Public Schools has ever turned out.) PO: "Yes, really. It's painted there on the pavement (he points) and there's a sign on most of the light poles down the street. (he points again)" Me: (now sheepish because I really hadn't noticed) "Oh. Ok. Do you need to see my license?" PO: "No, that's ok. I'm just warning you. Don't do it again." Me: (quavering) "Thank you, sir. I appreciate it. Have a good evening." PO: (walking back to his car) "You too, ma'am." Me: (inside voice) shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit Once I got done quaking in my rain boots, I realized...that police officer did me a solid favor. See, my last encounter with the black and whites was less than 18 months ago. Why does that matter? In California, every eighteen months you can take an online driver's ed class which masks a point on your license. You only get one every 18 months. So if I got a ticket I was plum outta luck in terms of my insurance. I was a little down and dour that day while headed to my meeting, but the rare kindness of the police officer brought a little decency to my gray and rainy day. Plus, I recalled one of the few bits of advice I carry with me from driver's ed classes. A police officer came to speak to us. He said, "Always be courteous to a police officer. ALWAYS. It might make the difference between getting a ticket and getting off with a warning." Thank YOU, McGinnis School of Driving.
Filed under: awkward, blogging, friends, gratitude, humility, life, nerd girl, Opinions, weekending, where I come from, writer, writing
On this happy, happy oh-holy-sheet-that-was-a-long-week Friday, I’m going to ask you, my dear readers, to head on over to a different blog.
Check out my buddy Alan Macfarlane’s blog Air Balls and Air Guitar.
He’s posted his next in a series of interviews called “Who are the people in your Twitterhood?”
This week, Alan and I sit down for a chat. His questions are great. My answers are long winded.
That tends to happen when two writers get together: A preponderance of words.
And by that I mean, I had A LOT of fun.
Thank you Alan! And have a great weekend.